What to do...

I've wanted to write something for the past week, but I've been at a total loss on how to start it... I haven't really got anything to say, because this thing I'm thinking about hasn't happened yet, but just the thought of it is getting me all riled up.

I went to see an art/living space.  I really liked it, and as I am prone to do, I got a little... obsessive.  I think about the place almost constantly, and I've made more pros/cons lists than I care to admit to.  All of them come out the same, with the pros outweighing the cons.  I've also made quite a few hypothetical budgets.  Oh, how I love making budgets.

But at this point, I'm having way more anxiety about it than it's worth.  I want to get on here and tell you how excited I am, how it's totally going to work out, and post pictures of this beautiful space, but for now all I can do is wait.

I'm awful at waiting.

So if there is anyone out there reading this who believes in positive energy, please send some my way, because I could really use it right now.  I want this to work out so badly, but not at the cost of my sanity, or my boyfriend's sanity more likely.

I appreciate you in advance.  :)

What I'm Doing... I Can't Figure That Out!

Lately I would describe my life, myself, as being "busy"... the funny thing is, I can't figure out what I'm so busy doing!

I wake up early enough in the morning to give myself time to "relax" before work (that means make coffee, usually read my favorite blogs, and smoke a cigarette or two), around 7am.  I don't think, though, that I've opened my computer in at least the last few days, definitely not the last few mornings.  I made coffee once... the only thing I can really guarantee I'm doing is the cigarette-smoking.

Then I work Monday-Friday, from 9am-5pm.  Okay, I can tell you that I have been busy at work.  I get a little time to answer personal emails, but sometimes I have to leave mid-email-conversation to do something in another part of the office, and forget to come back to it...  Obviously, a day like today is uncommon, but the only reason I can relax today is because I worked my butt off all week to finish everything.

Then I come home... usually I bike, sometimes I walk... I get home around 5-5:30pm, and this is what I'm confused about... other than making, and eating, dinner, WHAT in the world am I doing that takes me to my 10:30-11pm bedtime?  It might be tidying up, but it certainly isn't thorough cleaning... it isn't doing laundry, my 'fella does that (love him!).  It isn't buying groceries, because I don't think I've strayed from pasta or sandwiches for dinner once this week.  I take baths, but they're quick, no more than 20 minutes...

What in the world am I doing that leaves me feeling like I have no time to call or hang out with friends, register for Summer classes (oops!), update this blog, visit a farmer's market, clean the bathroom floor, paint the bedroom walls, or finish one of my dozens of "projects" around the house!?  Why is my apron hook project still in a pile on the chair, why have I still not completely properly unclogged the sink, why have I not made that police report for my bike that was stolen weeks ago!?  I would really like to know what is sucking up all of my time, so I could give it a swift kick and get back to gettin' sh!# done!!